Monthly Archives: November 2013

The Astrology Of Your Inner Moon Child: Moon In Pisces

matthew currie astrology moon in pisces

(I am presenting excerpts about Moon Signs from my book… a brief humorous description, followed by an appropriate Children’s Story. And keep on scrolling down for my best deal on astrological readings EVER. Enjoy!)

MOON IN PISCES

What a sweet, kind, wonderful, empathic creature you are! You are welcome in any environment and there is always room for you at a gathering, rather like Jell-O at a buffet. And usually, you end up suffering the same fate as Jell-O at a buffet: either ignored because everyone filled up on something more exciting, or swallowed whole and forgotten five minutes after the bill is paid. Being a gentle being at heart, you are unlikely to stand up for yourself in either eventuality. You are kind to a fault to everyone except perhaps yourself, which is who you usually end up blaming things on.

You have a dreamy vibe to you, and have probably experienced some form of psychic phenomena. This is a good thing, because your analytical skills probably aren’t the greatest and you need all the help you can get. Rudeness and unkindness are foreign to you, despite the fact that you are often on the receiving end of it. In a world populated entirely by people with Moon in Pisces, there would be no war or intolerance — but plenty of sedatives and antidepressants. In your relationships, you have probably given a lot more love than you’ve received, but are too nice to complain about it.

THE MOON IN PISCES STORY

“Oh, this is terrible, terrible!” Goldilocks sobbed as she laid her head down on the table and pounded her fists, making the dishes jump. “I was lost in the woods, and it wasn’t my fault, and I was so hungry… and your porridge looked so good! And I was going to leave a note apologizing! And I was going to leave money and a coupon for more porridge too!”

“And now…” she paused to blow her nose… “Now I’m going to get eaten by bears! And I love bears! They’re so cute and fuzzy, how could I not? It’s so unfair!”

“Listen, lady, I don’t know where you think you are,” The Mad Hatter said as he poured himself more tea, “but you’re obviously at the wrong party. Now shove off. All that crying is making the Dormouse wet.”

BLACK FRIDAY SAVINGS ON READINGS CONTINUE with my best offer of the year! Write today for details!

…Hey, it’s plenty better than fighting some kid over the last XBox, isn’t it?

 

The Astrology Of Thanksgiving/Hanukkah/Black Friday/Cyber Monday/Whatever

...Mom...?

…Mom…?

If you’ve noticed a certain sense of materialistic and/or food based agitation going on out there, you aren’t alone. Not only is it Thanksgivvukashopaholism Week, but Venus is opposite Jupiter for the entire stretch of time between now and early next week. Now, normally you’d expect a person with that aspect in their birth chart to be pretty sweet and pleasant and sociable, but when combined with the pressures to buy and to spend and to eat that come at this time of year, this transit could be a recipe for insanity.

So: why not fulfill your materialistic obligations towards friends and family with something a little more pleasant than fighting a crowd, less jerky than doing business with a place making its employees work on Thanksgiving, and way more awesome than a pair of socks?

Between now and Monday, I am offering my exclusive Thanksgivvukashopaholism Week Special on readings! You’ll get my BEST PRICE OF THE YEAR on a reading, PLUS a customized daily Kepler forecast, PLUS the thrill of getting a personal service that can really change your life from a guy who writes for Beliefnet, just like Deepak Chopra does sometimes! It makes a fantastic gift for yourself or for someone else… and the more you order, the better the deal gets.

Write today for details!

…Hey, it’s plenty better than fighting some kid over the last XBox, isn’t it?

 

Love And Sex In The Stars: Who Do You Love?

1482986_10152027985961206_938759511_nThe intersection of astrology and human hearts — who knows what things collide there? We do! Join Hilary and Matthew every week for fun, advice, tea and sympathy as we delve deep into the darkest reaches of the human heart and shine a little starlight in!

THIS EPISODE: We talk about what we love about each Sign, and the people who represent them. ALSO: a thrilling true-life tale of a Mars transits and an imperiled kitten. Yes, really.

Today at 4 PM Eastern/1 PM Pacific

CLICK HERE TO SET A REMINDER,

LISTEN LIVE, OR CATCH THE PODCAST!

 

 

The Astrology Of Your Inner Moon Child: Moon In Aquarius

matthew currie astrology moon in aquarius(I am presenting excerpts about Moon Signs from my book… a brief humorous description, followed by an appropriate Children’s Story. Enjoy!)

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MOON IN AQUARIUS

If you have Moon in Aquarius, you have a wonderfully open and accepting approach to life, which makes you a great companion and a terrible security guard. You don’t handle jealously well, because others can’t tell you who or what you should be… especially given that you may not know those things yourself. Moon in Aquarius has a wonderful ability to empathize with everyone, to the point where you become both the psychotherapist and the guy in the tinfoil hat. You often deal with this by trying to take a step back and logically evaluating your relationships, which may be wise but isn’t terribly romantic. You often stop and ask yourself how you feel about things, and often an answer is ages in coming.

Moon in Aquarius recognizes that all men are brothers, and you are always willing to help your brother out — unless we’re talking about an emergency loan, in which case all men are complete strangers and should go away. Nonetheless, people can (and do) find ways to take advantage of you at times. You are rarely cruel or mean, and can’t usually stand the thought of hurting anyone. This makes you a wonderful friend and a terrible surgeon.

 

THE MOON IN AQUARIUS STORY

“Off with her head!” The Queen commanded as she pointed at Alice. The Queen’s footmen all swarmed on Alice, and she threw up her arms defensively.

Then Alice grabbed several of the footmen and began arranging them in groups of four. “That’s not how it’s played at all” she said to the Queen. Alice then turned to the footmen in the back of the crowd. “Okay, you guys lie down in a pile, face down. Neatly, now.”

“Off with her head!” The Queen shouted, more angrily than before.

“Now that’s no way to run a poker tournament, Your Majesty.” Alice responded. “Here’s how it’s done.” She pointed to the group of four footmen closest to her. “See, I have a pair of eights here. So, Three and Nine, you go stand over there. Now, the two guys at the top of the pile over there? You guys come here.” Puzzled, the two footmen at the top of the pile complied. Alice smiled. “Oh boy! Three of a kind!”

“OFF WITH HER HEAD!!!”

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The Surprise Reading Special is now ALL MONTH LONG! CLICK HERE for details!

My new online course — THE MOON AND YOU — with Aliza from MoonPluto Astrology begins November 16th — CLICK HERE for more information!

Love And Sex In The Stars: April Elliot Kent

AprilKentTHIS EPISODE: Join us as astrologer April Elliot Kent and I discuss relationships, romance, setting a wedding date with astrology, and (probably) Breaking Bad, among other things.

4 PM EASTERN, 1 PM PACIFIC

CLICK HERE TO SET A REMINDER, LISTEN LIVE,

OR CATCH THE PODCAST!

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The Surprise Reading Special is now ALL MONTH LONG! CLICK HERE for details!

My new online course — THE MOON AND YOU — with Aliza from MoonPluto Astrology begins November 16th — CLICK HERE for more information!

The Daily Sky: Venus Sextile Neptune

venus neptuneVenus, as we all know, is The Goddess Of Love. She’s also good for the material comforts of life, and has a way with socializing in general. When Venus is pleasantly aspected, people tend to feel relaxed and comfortable and let their hair down a bit more than usual. Today she’s in range of a sextile with Mercury as well… making it a lovely day to communicate your fondness for someone.

And oh look… here’s a sextile from Neptune to help out! Venus and Neptune are always such good buddies: always leading with their hearts, always looking to extend beyond themselves and merge with someone else, and always so very, very… not realistic.

Watch your wallet, use protection, and have a Designated Driver lined up… and that’s just if you’re going home for a quiet evening by yourself.

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The Surprise Reading Special is now ALL MONTH LONG! CLICK HERE for details!

My new online course — THE MOON AND YOU — with Aliza from MoonPluto Astrology begins November 16th — CLICK HERE for more information!

 

Astrology? Funny? Sure, Why Not?

I was going through my old blog files and noticed I’ve spent entirely too much time playing with Paint and putting captions on pictures. So, in order to mark today’s Jupiter Station, I’m presenting a few of them again here for your (possible) enjoyment. Feel free to share ’em around Facebook and such if you like… some of them even get bigger if you click on them! Just give me some credit when you do so, okay? Unlike the people I swiped these images from… I have feelings, dammit.

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The Surprise Reading Special is now ALL MONTH LONG! CLICK HERE for details!

My new online course — THE MOON AND YOU — with Aliza from MoonPluto Astrology begins November 16th — CLICK HERE for more information!

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matthew currie astrology neptune

 

 

 

The Daily Sky: Jupiter Turns Retrograde

...and then Bonky realized that no matter how many balloon animals he made, kids were still terrified of him...

…then Bonky realized that no matter how many balloon animals he made, kids were still terrified of him…

Today, Jupiter comes to a slow grinding halt and begins to turn backwards at 21 degrees Cancer. Just because the planet of good luck and good times has gone retrograde doesn’t mean that things will be a non-stop bummer until next Spring when it goes forward again. In fact, for much of that time Jupiter will be trine Saturn, and for many of us making the changes we want in our lives to make them happier, more prosperous places will be easier than ever! It’ll be productive! Yayyy!

Oh boy… work! Sounds like fun!

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The Surprise Reading Special is now ALL MONTH LONG! CLICK HERE for details!

My new online course — THE MOON AND YOU — with Aliza from MoonPluto Astrology begins November 16th — CLICK HERE for more information!

 

 

 

The Daily Sky: Venus Enters Capricorn

venus in capricorn

Venus in Capricorn knows how to save money on her wardrobe budget, yet still look good.

There comes a time when a girl’s just gotta settle down. Today, Venus enters Capricorn after her long and often reckless jaunt through Sagittarius. During that time, Sagittarius’ ruler Jupiter was in its strongest placement — Cancer, a Water Sign — so romantic impulses were pretty strong and steady despite Sag’s reputation for keeping it light and keeping it moving.

In Capricorn, Venus is ruled by Saturn… and now Saturn is in Scorpio, another Water Sign. Emotional intensities are still high in love relationships and in material matters, but now the tone shifts to more depth and intensity. If you found someone to share a good time with in the last four weeks, expect things to be a little more serious. If your money was flying out the window during that time, expect to get a handle on things… or else your financial circumstances may tighten their grip on you, instead.

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The Surprise Reading Special is now ALL MONTH LONG! CLICK HERE for details!

My new online course — THE MOON AND YOU — with Aliza from MoonPluto Astrology begins November 16th — CLICK HERE for more information!