Category Archives: saturn

One Handy Guide To Three Years Of Saturn In Sagittarius

No, not THAT Saturn!

No, not THAT Saturn!

Once again it’s that time of year when we look back at all that we achieved in the last 12 months and think “holy cow what the heck is going to happen next OMG?”

Or something like that.

It’s understandable the people like to get readings from an astrologer at this time of year. And with Saturn having just left Scorpio and entering Sagittarius, for many of us our major concerns will be entering a whole new phase, and there will be new battles on new battlefields.

The great news is that there are also plenty of brand-new opportunities for new and better personal victories… and that’s where getting a reading comes in.

In honor of Saturn entering Sagittarius, between now and January 10th I am offering my all-new THREE YEARS OF SATURN package.

For the cost of a regular reading, you’ll not only get a regular reading… which covers all your concerns past present and future for the next year or so… I will also give you a bonus half hour when we will look in personalized detail as to what Saturn will be doing both for you and to you in the next three years.

It’s a reading and a half! It’s three years instead of one… all recorded for your convenient reference later on!  And it’s all for the price of ONE regular reading! Order NOW before I run out of exclamation points!

Write me for details, or to sign up NOW!

And hey, why not drop by and visit all my new blog material on Beliefnet?

 

Conquer The Universe With Astrology: Three-Way Karmic Action!

On the next “Conquer The Universe With Astrology”:


FIRST: Karmic Astrologer Marguerite Manning joins me to discuss “FATHER HUNGER AND MOMMY DEAREST: ARE YOU INVOLVED IN AN UNCONSCIOUS 3-WAY?” (I swear she came up with that title). We’ll be talking about all the unconscious ways your Venus and/or Saturn placement can really screw with your love life.



THEN: Canadian recording artist Veronica Start will join us for a very specific look at how that Uranus-Pluto square has panned out in her life so far. 


AND IN BETWEEN: Your questions answered when you call in or join the Chat Room, what to expect from Mars in Leo, and the occasional sound effect.

Thursday at 10 PM Eastern, 7 PM Pacific

(And for those of you who like to play along at home, Here’s Veronica’s chart, with transiting planets on the outside):

Astrology For Life On Earth

Free Curse Removal! The Jupiter-Saturn Opposition

You know those scams where some fake psychic claims you have a curse, and for X number of dollars he/she will “remove” it? Well, that’s a great way to make a lot of money for little work, but that isn’t my style. Tonight on “Conquer The Universe With Astrology” I’ll be discussing the current Jupiter-Saturn opposition and its effects on you. Plus, give me a call at (323) 443-7252 and I’ll answer your questions!

And if I DO remove your curse… or if you just appreciate the show and the advice, feel free to drop by and visit my Donations Page. And no, I won’t hex you if you don’t.

10 PM Eastern, 7 PM Pacific

Check out my show! If you like what you hear… there’s more to come in the future! Please feel free to drop by and visit my Donations Page. It’s what keeps me going and, and you might just get a surprise…

And yes, I still send free stuff to everyone who writes me!


If you’re new to this blog, here’s a sample of my previous shows and blog entries. Enjoy!
Astrology For Life On Earth

Sit Down, Shut Up, And Listen To Saturn

Hear that grinding noise? Odds are good that’s transiting Saturn working its steamroller magic on you somehow. Today on “Conquer The Universe With Astrology,” I’ll be looking at Saturn: what it does, what it’s sending your way, and when to duck. Listen LIVE at 3 PM Eastern (Noon Pacific),

Listening live? Got questions? Call me at (323) 443-7252!

Check out my show! If you like what you hear… there’s more to come in the future! Please feel free to drop by and visit my Donations Page. It’s what keeps me going and, and you might just get a surprise…

And yes, I still send free stuff to everyone who writes me!
Astrology For Life On Earth

North Korean Astrology: Let’s Learn About Saturn, Or Else!

Those pesky North Koreans: not only are they arming themselves with nuclear weapons, they’re arming themselves with astrology! Recoil in terror at this educational video recently smuggled out of Pyongyang in the luggage of a numerologist posing as a UN Relief worker. Funny thing is, though: an oppressive, monolithic, controlling state like North Korea seems to have a pretty good grasp on the whole Saturn concept. Watch this terrifying glimpse into totalitarian astrological technique…

Join me this Thursday on “Conquer The Universe With Astrology” when my guest will be Jeff Jawer! CLICK HERE to set a reminder…
Astrology For Life On Earth

Astro-Singalong: Full Moon In Aquarius, Jupiter And Uranus Opposing Mars And Saturn

(Catch me at Tedda Hughes Gallery tonight, 7:30 to 9, 1623 Polk Street, San Francisco!)

When you were young and your heart was an open book
You used to say life and let live
(you know you did, you know you did you know you did)
But in this ever changing world in which we live in
Makes you give in and cry
Say live and let die


Live and let die
Live and let die
Live and let die


What does it matter to ya?
When you got a job to do
You gotta do it well
You gotta give the other fellow hell


When you were young and your heart was an open book
You used to say life and let life
(you know you did, you know you did you know you did)
But in this ever changing world in which we live in
Makes you give in and cry…


-Paul McCartney & Wings, “Live And Let Die”


Astrology For Life On Earth

Papers Please: Saturn Is Detained At The Virgo-Libra Border

(My usual stuff is HERE at Astrologydating.com, and you can write me HERE for details on a reading, and free stuff!)

(SCENE: A small customs office at the Virgo-Libra border. Outside, on the Virgo side of the border, a small crowd is gathered, cheering and waving banners that say things like “Good Riddance!” and “See you in 28 Years!” On the Libra side of the border, a few somberly-dressed tour guides quietly await their new client. Inside the Custom’s Office, SATURN sits patiently in his long black robe at a desk while a LIBRA security guard examines SATURN’S papers.)

LIBRA: Business, or pleasure?

SATURN: Pleasure. (pauses) Just kidding.

LIBRA: Okay, everything looks in order here. You have baggage?

SATURN: (Lifts an improbably large suitcase) Just this one bag.

LIBRA: All right. The dogs didn’t smell any controlled substances (raises his rubber stamp above SATURN’S passport) so you’re all clear to —

(Suddenly, the door behind the guard bursts open, and MEL GIBSON bursts into the room)

MEL GIBSON: (Shouting) Stop that motherBLEEPing planet!! (His speech throughout is interrupted by a “bleeping” sound that seems to appear out of nowhere)

LIBRA: (Startled) What are you doing here? You aren’t even a Libra!

MEL GIBSON: This BLEEPer has been BLEEPing with me for too BLEEPing long! (MEL GIBSON pulls a semiautomatic pistol out of his jacket and unloads the entire clip into SATURN’S chest. LIBRA ducks under the table.) Die you BLEEPing piece of BLEEP!

SATURN: (Completely unimpressed) Yeah, like that was going to do you any good.

MEL GIBSON: BLEEP! BLEEP! I hate you motherBLEEPer! I don’t deserve the BLEEP you’ve BLEEPing given me! My Moon is at zero BLEEPing degrees Libra and it’s ruining my BLEEPing personal and professional life!

SATURN: (Calmly explaining to LIBRA, who is still under the table) Mr. Gibson is clearly displeased with the nature of my work. You see, it’s my job to —

MEL GIBSON: It should be your job to shut the BLEEP up and go BLEEP yourself! I hate you! You hear me? You do NOTHING for me!

SATURN: Actually, in the long run, I do plenty for you. You see, as a person goes through their life they do various things that could be considered “right” or “wrong,” both in a practical and a larger, spiritual sense. I’m just here to provide —

(Several security guards enter the room and drag MEL GIBSON away)

MEL GIBSON: I hope you get gangBLEEPed by a bunch of BLEEPs until your BLEEP falls off, you BLEEPing — (the guards drag MEL away and the door closes.)

LIBRA: (After a long pause) So, um… what’s in the suitcase?

SATURN: (Patting the suitcase affectionately) Karma. Lots and lots of Karma.

Astrology For Life On Earth

Astro-Singalong: Mars Conjunct Saturn In Virgo, Ruled By Mercury In Leo

I could be wrong I could be right

I could be wrong I could be right
I could be wrong I could be right
I could be black I could be white
I could be black I could be white
I could be white I could be black

Your time has come your second skin
The cost so high the gain so low
Walk through the valley
The written word is a lie








May the road rise with you
May the road rise with you
May the road rise with you

I could be wrong I could be right
I could be wrong I could be right
I could be black I could be white
I could be right I could be wrong
I could be black I could be white

They put a hot wire to my head
Cos of the things I did and said
And made these feelings go away
Model citizen in every way

Anger is an energy
Anger is an energy
Anger is an energy
Anger is an energy
Anger is an energy
Anger is an energy

I could be wrong I could be right
I could be wrong I could be right
I could be wrong I could be right
I could be black I could be white
I could be right I could be wrong
I could be black I could be white

Your time has come your second skin
Cost so high the gain so low
Walk through the valley
The written word is a lie

I could be wrong I could be right
Could be wrong –
They put a hot wire to my head
Cos of the things I did and said
A model citizen in every way
Your time has come your second skin
Cost so high the gain so low

Anger is an energy
Anger is an energy
Anger is an energy
Anger is an energy
Anger is an energy
Anger is an energy
Anger is an energy
Anger is an energy

I could be wrong I could be right
I could be wrong I could be right
I could be wrong I could be right
I could be black I could be white
I could be right I could be wrong
I could be black I could be white

Your time has come your second skin
Cost so high the gain so low
Walk through the valley
The written word is a lie

I could be wrong I could be right
Could be wrong –
The put a hot wire to my head
Cos of the things I did and said
A model citizen in every way
Your time has come your second skin
Cost so high the gain so low

Anger is an energy
Anger is an energy…
-Public Image Limited, “Rise”

Astrology For Life On Earth

Astro-Singalong: Lingering Doubts As Saturn in Virgo Quincunxes Neptune In Aquarius

Father look in my eyes
See me as I really am
You made me
Now take me…


Tell me how it feels now
Behold you flesh has come of age
Forsake me, you break me…
Father!




Strong as I am
There’s something about this thing that scares me
Strong as I Am
There’s something about this thing that dares me
Strong as I Am
There’s something about this thing that haunts me
Strong as I Am
There’s something about this thing that taunts me


Mother let me heal you
Your pain has lasted far too long
Release it…it kills you
See me as I feel you
The love you would not share grows tired of waiting


Strong as I am
There’s something about this thing that scares me
Strong as I Am
There’s something about this thing that dares me
Strong as I Am
There’s something about this thing that haunts me
Strong as I Am
There’s something about this thing that taunts me


Will I leave them? I say no.
They ask me, “Will you leave us?”…I say…no.

-“Strong As I Am,” The Prime Movers

Astrology For Life On Earth