Category Archives: scorpio

Fun With Scorpio! (Another "Conquer The Universe With Astrology" Original Video)

Oh Scorpio… so fun loving, so understanding, so willing to not take yourself seriously… I’m sorry it took me so long to put this together for you, and I know how you love it when someone teases you and denies you and then… please Scorpio, please.. just put the knife down and watch, okay?

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Astrology For Life On Earth

Astro-Singalong: Scorpio Drunk Dials The Libra Ex

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Send a heartbeat to the void that cries through you 
Relive the pictures that have come to pass 
For now we stand alone 
The world is lost and blown 
And we are flesh and blood disintegrate 
With no more to hate.

Is it bright where you are, and have the people changed?
Does it make you happy you’re so strange? 
And in your darkest hour 
My old secrets laid
We can watch the world devoured in its pain.

Delivered from the blast , the last of a line of lasts 
The pale princess of a palace cracked 
And now the kingdom comes 
Crashing down undone 
And I am a master of a nothing place 
Of recoil and grace

Is it bright where you are, and have the people changed?
Does it make you happy you’re so strange? 
And in your darkest hour 
I hold secrets flame 
We can watch the world devoured in its pain.

Time has stopped before us 
The sky cannot ignore us 
No one can separate us 
For we are all that is left 
The echo bounces off me 
The shadow lost beside me 
There’s no more need to pretend 
Cause now I can begin again.

Is it bright where you are, and have the people changed?
Does it make you happy you’re so strange?
And in your darkest hour 
my old secrets laid
We can watch the world devoured in its hate. 


-Smashing Pumpkins, “Beginning Is The End Is The Beginning”

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Book Excerpt: Sun In Scorpio

(The first episode of “Conquer The Universe With Astrology: The Radio Show” begins August 19th! Subcribe to this blog for further details… or find me on Twitter (@MatthewCurrie) or on Facebook! Hope to see you all there!)
Scorpios are the most likely sign to have a complex about what sign there are. And for good reason: Scorpios have accumulated a reputation for being vengeful, wilful, and oversexed. This is inherently unfair to a Scorpio. They aren’t any worse than anyone else… they’re just far more focused about it when they are being awful.

The symbol for Scorpio is the scorpion, which is a creature capable of surviving and thriving in a wide variety of difficult environments. Biologists point out that this is due to their tough build and a stinger in the tail. The truth, however, is that most scorpions are just too stubborn to die under normal circumstances. And, in the event you have one wanting to kill you, they are unlikely to give up until they’ve achieved that goal too.

Scorpios are easy to annoy. All you have to do is invade their privacy, ask too many questions, or turn them down for sex. They make excellent reporters and detectives, which are career paths noted for involvement with invading people’s privacy, asking too many questions, and sex. This is often balanced out by a great deal of inner strength and wisdom, which was usually hard-won after years of being told they’re too intense.

Once a Scorpio sets their mind to something, they are incredibly difficult to stop. And they generally don’t take it well if you try. Remember that friend of yours when you were a kid who totally freaked out when he lost a game of Monopoly? That kid was probably a Scorpio.

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How To Seduce A Scorpio Man

If you read the quick and easy guides to the Sun Signs you find at any typical supermarket check-out, you might get the impression that the best and easiest way to get a Scorpio man into the sack is to tell him in detail about your bondage gear, your prehensile tongue, or that drunken experimentation you did with your college room-mate.

Nonsense. Sure, Scorpios like sex, but they are subtle creatures too.

Here’s how to bag that scorpion: Proceed in the same way you would with anyone else. Let’s say a nice dinner over lobster and wine… or tacos and mini-golf. It doesn’t matter.

The one thing you should do to handle him slightly differently than other guys? Make sure your bra strap peeks out. Or… if conditions permit… a thong strap. But not both.

Preferably this strap should be red, or black, or some girly color. Or maybe a nice floral lace pattern. The point is to subtly draw attention to something that (theoretically) should not be visible. Don’t make a big deal out of it.

Watch his eyes and see how long it takes him to notice this. Of course, if he is locked into making eye contact with you, you probably don’t need my help. The second time you catch him glancing at your peek-a-boo lingerie show, subtly carry on with your conversation as you poke it back into place. A few minutes later, move your shoulder enough to let it pop out again. Don’t repeat this too many times… two or three times should be more than enough.

The point here is to let him know that you are a woman, and that there is more going on beneath the surface. Something that maybe you’d normally hide, but you are comfortable enough with him that you don’t mind him knowing it. That, and there are only a few millimeters of fabric between him and The Promised Land. And if he plays his cards right, you’ll give him a guided tour. What you do with him after this is entirely up to you. He’ll think that’s all up to him… but of course, you and I know better.

For further information on how to seduce a Scorpio (or anyone else, for that matter) please consult the “Let’s All Seduce Someone” episode of “Love And Sex In The Stars,” presented by!

For specific guidance on how to seduce, amuse, delight, decode, or tolerate the Scorpio (or anyone else) in your life, please refer to my Readings page, and please note my “Summer Lovin’ Special” (in conjunction with Aliza from Two astrologers and two perspectives for less than the price of one!

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I’m Scorpio, And I Approved This Message

My opposing sign, Taurus, has been slinging the bull around about my reputation. Dirty campaign tactics like that are uncalled for, and leave it to Taurus to fight dirty and come across all sweet and sunshiny about it.

Leadership requires an ability to take action. When that red phone rings at three AM, you’ll want to have someone in charge who is willing to make the tough decisions. Heck, you might even want someone in charge who enjoys the thought of blasting an opponent… especially one who really really deserves it.

I do not, as you may have been told, sit back and fume over things and slowly plot my horrifying revenge. I act on those impulses as soon as I can and get it done, so I can move on to other matters.

You know who you are, people.

In addition to my willingness to take bold action, you’ll find that I am as kind, compassionate, caring, and even-handed as any other sign. I believe that if you take an honest objective look at my record, you’ll see that too.

Thank you for your time, and for listening patiently. I’ll untie you from that chair now.

I’m Scorpio, and I approved this message.

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Aries Man, Meet Scorpio Woman

(Click on the picture to Jupiter-size it!)

It’s funny: all those sun-sign romance guides there seem to think that an Aries and a Scorpio together will eventually lead to something blowing up. I’ve seen this combination in the real world over and over again… despite advice from well-meaning paperbacks and columnists. It seems that the key to making this relationship work is finding something to blow up together.

Traditionally, they are both Mars-ruled signs. Find something to do with that energy… other than just sex, Scorpio, that can get old eventually too… and it can work.

And for all you Aries guys out there? If you think that Scorpio woman you’re after wasn’t all that impressed the first time… well, you’re probably right. But Scorpios don’t like quitters, and that just isn’t your style. And for you Scorpio women with an eye on an Aries man… well, be patient. He’s bound to get tired of all that running around eventually…

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The Bull By The Balls: A Taurus And Scorpio Love Story For Everyone

Above is a detail from a sculpture at the British Museum, depicting the legend of Mithras, who was the object of a Mystery Religion found throughout the ancient Roman world. In this legend, Mithras is frequently depicted killing a bull, and (in most cases)a scorpion is attacking the bull’s cojones.

There are lots of places you can read up on the astronomical/seasonal significance of this central image of Mithraism. As an astrologer though, I have my own observations:

-It has been my experience that the upside of the legendary Taurus stubbornness is, literally, a refusal to die easily.

-Taurus and Scorpio are naturally drawn to each other, maybe more than most oppositions. Although one could make a case for that being because the signs are ruled by Venus and Mars, personally I think it’s because both signs secretly love a challenge… frequently while they’re complaining about how much they hate the challenge.

-Scorpios aren’t afraid to go for the groin shot when it’s going to score points.

Finally, and most importantly: those who seek True Love (or those who have It find Them) had better leave all their preconceptions at the door. You have some preconceptions about what sign he/she is, or his/her Moon sign, appearance, location, ethnicity, marital status, age, shoe size? Best give all those notions up now. When it hits, it hits.

And sometimes, if we focus on our preconceptions instead of what is True, it can be a huge pain in the balls. But it’s always worth it.


Astrology For Life On Earth

CSI: Romance – The Scorpio Guide To Compatibility

There’s a mystery to be uncovered here. A blow to the heart… an intense, passionate experience causing shortness of breath, rapid irregular heartbeat, and a flood of endorphins throughout the nervous system, clouding judgement. Although it’s enticing, you can sense the ever-present spectre of danger… and that only increases your curiosity.

Congratulations! You’re a Scorpio in a relationship! Here’s what you can expect…


Scene: The Las Vegas Coroner’s Autopsy Room. Chief Investigator Gil Grissom and coroner Dr. Al Robbins stand over the badly-mangled body of an adult male.

DOC: Victim was a white male, approximately 35 years old, name unknown. A Scorpio.

GRISSOM: How can you tell?

DOC: We found this medallion on the victim. Also, this scorpion tattoo. Scorpios love that stuff. There’s little sign of struggle… we can presume the victim knew his assailant. Probably someone he was in a relationship with.

GRISSOM: A Taurus?

AL: That’s a common guess… but notice the large chest wound. Tauruses are steady and sensual, which would explain the relationship, but their killing technique is usually through stubbornness… refusal to budge.

GRISSOM: Another Water Sign, maybe?

AL: Good possibility of it. They have the emotional depth a Scorpio is looking for. But I’d expect the body to be more weighed down with the assailant’s emotional baggage if it was a Cancer, and there’s no mawkish sentiment filling the lungs, so it wasn’t the usual Pisces drowning.

GRISSOM: It could have been a Capricorn.

AL: Yes. Scorpio’s seem to find them sexy, but there’s limited bruising here. Capricorn usually kill their partners by battering them to death with their inflexibility. Like Taurus, only edgier.

GRISSOM: An Aries, maybe? They’re both Mars-ruled, they both love excitement…

AL: And Aries doesn’t usually have the patience for Scorpio’s caution and analysis. Although admittedly the passion and potential violence of Aries and Scorpio together is noteworthy.

GRISSOM: It could have been another Scorpio.

AL: I doubt it. They cling on to each other passionately enough, but Scorpios usually bury their flaws… and their victims… deep enough for no one to find them until it’s too late. This guy was found on his couch. Notice the tissue under the victims fingernails: it matches the scarring around the ears. It’s self-inflicted.

GRISSOM: Like he was trying to claw out his own eardrums. Maybe a Gemini or a Virgo, then. Scorpio’s love watching the thought processes those two have, until the talking has gone on too long.

AL: Good point. But I’m not sure a relationship with a Gemini would have the depth our vic was looking for, and the vic’s eardrums aren’t swollen from the debating. I did a swab of the genitals… no recent sign of sexual activity. Scorpios usually go ape for Virgos that way. Death by nagging is the Virgo style, though.

GRISSOM: Sagittarius? Libra?

AL: They both have their charms, but I’m not sure either one has the depth Scorpio is looking for. At least they don’t usually act like it enough to Scorpio’s liking. No glucose poisoning, which is Libra’s usual m.o., and no hoof marks from a Sagittarius stampeding away, which they usually do quickly.

GRISSOM: I suppose the logical place to look then would be with Scorpio’s least compatible signs… Leo and Aquarius.

AL: Aquarius is usually too hard to pin down for a Scorpio… which can be intriguing, but Aquariuses don’t usually kill off their victims so dramatically. They prefer to remove their partners through diffusion in abstract thought processes. A Leo certainly has the passion a Scorpio wants, but the Leo usually kills via self-importance and/or pomposity. I dusted for pomposity… none present.

(CSI agent SARAH SIDLE enters, waving a note)

SARAH: Gris, we found this note at the crime scene!

GRIS: You mean…?

SARAH: He did it to himself!

GRIS: We usually do, Sarah. We usually do.



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